I have four kids. The two oldest kids live out on their own and the middle son is in transition in terms of being between home and wherever else it is that he hangs out most of the time and our daughter is home. (she is 13) One would think that with kids who are mostly out of the house I would have all the free time in the world to write…I’m here to tell you it ain’t true.
When you are a parent there is never a time when you get to just stop being one. My kids always need something…encouragement, a loan (well they call it a “loan”, we all know I am just giving them money because I will never see it again) a ride, the list is endless and it would appear that the very time they need something is the exact time I have sat down to work. It is frustrating.
The kids are not the only interruptions either. There is the spouse who calls to remind me of stuff I have to do, there are the friends who seem to be able to create more drama than a soap opera on any given day, there are the dogs who are embarked upon a marathon to see how many times they can get me away from my desk to let them out and there is the cat who seems to think that my desktop is a little kitty race track. It just never ends.
As a writer I have learned that there will be times when folks just will not leave you be to write. When you work at home you tend to end up being the go to parent or the go to spouse because everyone else thinks….well they are home so why can’t they. I have spent over 30 years and many, many published works trying to convince my family and friends that I need time to work but today my daughter is playing loudly on the Wii, my middle son needs help filling out papers, my other middle son needs to talk and one of my friends just called to declare that she is leaving her partner again…for the 17th time and that’s all there is to it….
I could tell you to unplug your phone but then you would worry about no one being able to get ahold of you. I could tell you to ignore the spouse but its winter time and the nights are too cold to sleep alone. I could tell you to ignore the kids but any kid of 18 years old will show up anyways and if you ignore the ones who are still minors….well…you could get arrested for that. The truth is there is no perfect time to write that is quiet and worry free because, frankly, we don’t live in that world. We just have to continue to steal time where we can even if most of the time it’s between Top Ramen soup fests and opening the back door for the barking dog who appears to have a bladder issue. Life happens and for us writers if often tends to happen all over us so muck up kids and steal the time where you can. Maybe someday you can sell that novel and purchase an island from which to write…or at the very least cages for the kids…..
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